When a stay at home mom goes back to work she needs a resume so sparkling and shiny that she has to lock it up each night in a drawer and shove it under the bed so that the shining light streaming off the page doesn’t keep her family up at night. treasureYou need the holy grail of a resume so they view you as a lost treasure that has once again been found to bestow your knowledge and experience upon their grateful business. Or at least that’s what it feels like. I’ve always been more of a ‘who you know’ kind of girl instead of a ‘what you know’ type of employee. This is an excellent way to network and find jobs when you live in an area where you are plugged-in. Not so excellent when your husband’s job moves you around every few years. I haven’t always been this disconnected. The moment I graduated from high-school I was looking for a job. I had the thought that I wanted to be a lawyer so my plan was to find a part-time job at a law firm while I worked my way through college. My uncle was a detective that just happened to know a lot of lawyers and he scored me an interview to be a runner for a law firm. It wasn’t just any law firm, it was the best in San Angelo, Texas. I was lucky I had the personality to land the job once I got the interview. Sherri is a tough nut to crack and I showed up to my interview unknowingly looking like a mini version of Sherri. It helped that I had a work ethic to back up my connections. I enjoyed the job, but in retrospect this was the opportunity of a lifetime. If you can imagine, this was before everything was on the internet and I was the physical representation of everything the internet now does. I might have been running errands, but in reality I was networking. Between my job at the law firm, my social worker aunt, my detective uncle, and my father that was a policeman; I knew all the clerks, judges, lawyers, bankers, everyone at the title companies, post offices, the bakery (the lawyers loved that cake), most of the policemen, warrant officers, undercover detectives, all of the support offices for adult protective, the current mayor, the librarians and by the time I was ready to move on from that job I knew that town like the back of my hand. My next job plugged me into the other half of San Angelo. I started working at one of the biggest radio stations in town. I worked directly under the Sales Director and she never stopped working. If a business could advertise, I knew who they were and they knew me. I was the gatekeeper to the Sales Team that made them money. A few times, I got lucky and JoAnna would take me with her to her committee meetings. The bullet points I was able to add to my resume from this job were gold. My letter of recommendation from the owner Beth Auldridge landed me no less than two jobs in California. exhaleBut that was then and this was now. Thousands of miles and fifteen years past the time when I was plugged in and ready to conquer the world. My resume is not shiny and sparkling. I can barely remember my actual title from the last job I had. I hope to heck I wrote it down because the last thing I was thinking of when I walked out that door for the last time was making sure my bullet points where up to date. What I was thinking was more along the lines of when Angela Basset walks away burning her car in Waiting to Exhale. FiddlerI’ve been reading blogs and tips about stay at home moms going back to work. They are sad, sad tips that boil down to dress nice, don’t say ‘potty’ or ‘num-nums’ in the interview and hope for the best. I’ve seen more hopeful tips for prisoners getting out of prison searching for a job. Here is the truth with zero sugar-coating. It’s going to boil down to who you know. I need a Stay at Home Mom Version of Yente the matchmaker. Matchmaker, matchmaker, find me a match. Find me a find, catch me a catch.