I’ll mail you a postcard from prison.

My husband and I work as a team in the mornings to get our children to school. I wake up early and get the clothes picked out, breakfast made, lunches in totes and I double-check the calendar for extra items they might need like a violin or athletic clothes.

I also brush their hair and herd them along like a cattle dog. If they pause too long over any one activity I nip at their heels to get them going again. My husband loads them up into his truck and takes them to school.

This is a good trade-off as I am cranky in the mornings. I don’t enjoy the mornings, I prefer silence for a full hour after I’ve woken up, I’m not just miraculously happy. The kids know the routine well enough that I mumble one word sentences like, ‘eat, clothes, hair’ and they move along. By the time they are loading up in the car they are extremely chatty. Blake has the harder job as he gets them emotionally and mentally prepared for their day while they are in the car. He wakes up happy. It’s a sickness. I’m positive. I’m told they pray and sing in the car.

Some mornings my cattle dog nip becomes a little too harsh. This is unfortunate as I have one child that will completely shut down, stop all forward momentum and you might as well call in sick. All activity ceases until things are once again right with the world.

Lily was in Pre-K and we were having to rush a little faster one morning as the elder sister had an activity that required her to be to school 10 minutes ahead of schedule. Lily was a little extra sleepy and she was just standing in our bathroom swaying back and forth while I’m holding her clothes attempting to get her dressed. I was about to start screaming and then Blake gently said to her, “Honey be my good girl and take your jammies off.” Not 5 seconds later all she could say was, “Daddy says I’m his good girl when I take my jammies off.”

Great Odin’s Raven! I thought we were going to die right on the spot. The look of absolute horror on my husbands face cannot be captured in words. He was traumatized. Still traumatized as we continue to talk about this in horrified whispers and Lily is in first grade.

CardWhen I’m winding down I like to zone out by playing card games on the computer. I really like to play spider solitaire. You’d have to look up the directions but when you are winning you build up decks at the bottom left of your screen from A – K with the K on top. So at the end you have eight decks in a row. Basically 8 K’s are lined up on your screen if you win.

Landry watches me play this game often. Today she comes up to me and says, “Mommy you are winning. You have KKK. Mommy likes KKK. Mommy you really like the KKK.”

Son of a Bee-Sting! The kids are going to get us sent up the river or hung from a tree.

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